Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Randomize
