Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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