xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
i out mim tonsoeep
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize