He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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