what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
