so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
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