ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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