I just pynch a tree in the face
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize