rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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