just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize