i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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