I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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