Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
she peed on how many people?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
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