What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
