Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
