so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Randomize
