You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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