Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
