Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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