There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Randomize
