I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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