HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Randomize
