Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
