bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Randomize
