Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
