The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
