It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
