Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
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