I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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