They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Is it penis luge time yet?
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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