I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Randomize
