she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Randomize
