Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
