Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
