But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
