this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize