My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Dicks are not precious.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
