How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
