My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
