32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
