I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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