i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
