i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
