Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
