I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
