Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Randomize
