Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
