Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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