I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Success! We fucked roommates!
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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