i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
